Description
Choosing my religion, by Kit Walkham
A sketch asking whether churches are promoting a consumer experience, or introducing Jesus.
Requires:
One woman (the Seeker, who looks as though she might need to lose weight)
One man (representing Jesus)
Two others who could be Male or Female
If a projector and/or sound system is available, slides and music excerpts may be played to
illustrate the choices, as in text.
Salesperson and Assistant are at a stall at a trade show. Seeker approaches, meaning to walk past stall and not stop, but is intercepted.
SALESP Good morning Madam, is this your first time at the Show
SEEKER Yes - there's such a lot to take in.
SALESP Indeed, but we are here to make choices easier for you.
SEEKER What do you..
SALESP Our specialty is religion. Do you have a religion at present Madam
SEEKER (starting to move on) Not now. I did have one, but I lost it, and I am not looking for a replacement.
SALESP That's what many of our clients say - I am sure we can help you out. What brand of religion do you prefer
SEEKER I was a Christian some years ago, but…
SALESP Some years ago - so you won't have seen the 21st century models. Much improved customer satisfaction - even the seats are comfortable.
[Ushers SEEKER into chair.] Let us show you some options… . [Beckons Assistant over]
ASSISTANT We can offer a wide range of buildings [slides play] - town centre or rural, ornate or minimalist, large or small, ancient or modern.
SALESP And a full choice of music [sounds play] - full organ, gentle flute, heavy metal, plainsong, male voice choir.
SEEKER I do like a male voice choir.
Continues...
A sketch asking whether churches are promoting a consumer experience, or introducing Jesus.
Requires:
One woman (the Seeker, who looks as though she might need to lose weight)
One man (representing Jesus)
Two others who could be Male or Female
If a projector and/or sound system is available, slides and music excerpts may be played to
illustrate the choices, as in text.
Salesperson and Assistant are at a stall at a trade show. Seeker approaches, meaning to walk past stall and not stop, but is intercepted.
SALESP Good morning Madam, is this your first time at the Show
SEEKER Yes - there's such a lot to take in.
SALESP Indeed, but we are here to make choices easier for you.
SEEKER What do you..
SALESP Our specialty is religion. Do you have a religion at present Madam
SEEKER (starting to move on) Not now. I did have one, but I lost it, and I am not looking for a replacement.
SALESP That's what many of our clients say - I am sure we can help you out. What brand of religion do you prefer
SEEKER I was a Christian some years ago, but…
SALESP Some years ago - so you won't have seen the 21st century models. Much improved customer satisfaction - even the seats are comfortable.
[Ushers SEEKER into chair.] Let us show you some options… . [Beckons Assistant over]
ASSISTANT We can offer a wide range of buildings [slides play] - town centre or rural, ornate or minimalist, large or small, ancient or modern.
SALESP And a full choice of music [sounds play] - full organ, gentle flute, heavy metal, plainsong, male voice choir.
SEEKER I do like a male voice choir.
Continues...
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