Description
Love yourself?
‘Jesus told us to love our neighbours as ourselves and to do that we must first love ourselves.’ That sounds very reasonable and quite logical but I have problems with this popular statement. First of all, if it is that obvious, why is it a saying that has only arisen in recent decades rather than one which can be traced through the wisdom of centuries? Secondly, is it not of the essence of love that it is for the other, not for oneself? We wouldn’t really consider a person who loves himself as the most loving.
But the biggest problem I have with it is that it is not only a consequence which Jesus never drew from his teaching but also one that is not found elsewhere in the Bible. In fact it is the opposite that is there. Jesus said ‘whoever loves himself is lost, but he who hates himself in this world will be kept safe for eternal life’ (John 12:25). The language is Jesus is sometimes deliberately shocking, especially when compared to popular wisdom. When Paul wrote to the Ephesians (5:28) that ‘men ought to love their wives, as they love their own bodies’ he adds that ‘In loving his wife a man loves himself.’ He continues that ‘no one ever hated his own body’. Today some would disagree with Paul about that but self-hatred is a psychological disorder to which self-love is not the remedy.
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